Anything Lime

life update

Patrick stopped by my house while he was passing through town between golf tournaments. Most of our time spent together has been him complaining about his back injury or wishing he did better in his last tournament. I don’t even pretend to listen and just turn up the TV.

When he leaves again on Monday for yet another two-week trip, it will mean that I got to see him one out of five weeks. I know because I started counting the number of fork jabs in my arm – one for every miserable night when I got up 87 times to check the door locks because I’m afraid to sleep alone. Such is my miserable life.

So anyway, after this weekend I’ll be about as thrilled for him to leave as I am to fork over whatever money I can get for my pancreas on the black market to cover the cost of repairs on my car. Turns out the breaks don’t work. I’d say it was a scary discovery, but I wasn’t even there when my car apparently made an attempt to end my life. Patrick, who was piloting my jet at that time, got some delight out of being able to down shift and pull on the e-brake all the way home. I suppose I should thank the Baby Jesus he made it home safely. And, had we NOT switched cars because I was out of gas and running late for work, I most certainly would have been killed. Never again will I take for granted my laziness when it comes to filling up my car. Or the fact that Patrick leaps at the opportunity to take a death cruise in a automobile rigged to explode. Either way, I think it’s fate that it happened the way it did.

Tonight we’re heading out with another couple, Amy and Carlos, to see Wall-E. I’m excited to see it because I heard it was a kid’s movie that had underlying messages for adults. I love stories like that. That’s why I have such an appreciation for Dr. Seuss, because what better way to teach adults important life lessons than to have them preach it to their children in the form of bedtime stories all while making funny voices to mock the crazily-drawn characters with silly names. Amen.

On a totally unrelated note, today was my first Tijuana Flats experience, and while I am often leery about eating big lunches, I walked away feeling happy and satisfied. I got a vegetarian taco salad with black beans, a whole-wheat shell and delicious fresh veggies. It’s the first real taco salad I’ve had since I stopped eating meat three months ago. I’ve not only become more aware of the things I’m putting into my body, but I’ve grown to have more appreciation for food.

Just last week I took a friend out for lunch for her birthday, and she encouraged me to try seared tuna salad because despite cutting meat out of my diet, I still eat fish. More accurately, I have begun eating fish.

Not much else is new in my life. My little sister is getting married next Monday. Who has a wedding on a Monday? Another reason why my experience of having a little sister has been remarkably similar to living in another realm, a dream realm where there’s no such thing as responsibilities or good decision making, where eccentricity is rewarded and where flying by the seat of one’s pants is the only way to live life. That, and being a professional ribbon dancer slash lion tamer. BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT PEOPLE DO!

And even though I love her by default because she’s my sister, there are so many things I don’t understand about her. I guess that’s true of all my sisters. Mostly their medical problems. One has every disease ever known to mankind, one has every disease that has yet to be discovered and the other was recently diagnosed with something terminal that miraculously went away when it came time to start planning her wedding next Monday.

This is the part where I’m expected to say something lame and warm and totally heartfelt, like, “They’re completely weird and crazy and bitchy and they used to record over my mix tapes and eat my Barbie shoes and ruin my things and steal my clothes and break the arms off of my precious moments figurines, but you take the bad in with the good, and I wouldn’t trade them for the world.” eh…I suppose that will suffice.


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  1. * ashley says:

    Just wanted to say that I was the one who collected Precious Moments, and I would never do such a thing as break their arms off! How rude!

    Also, why does this entry sound so depressing? Oh, and which sister am I? I hope you weren’t referring to me when you said “bitchy”

    Love you :)

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 10 months ago
  2. * ashley says:

    By the way, it was you and Kelsey that stole MY clothes. You turned out to be alright, but Kelsey has a serious mental problem.

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 10 months ago
  3. * anythinglime says:

    CHRIST ASHLEY! You want to tell people about your problems? GET YOUR OWN DAMN BLOG!

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 10 months ago
  4. * Ash says:

    OK, well that’s the last time I read your blog. Thank you.

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 10 months ago

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